Books not Bunting

I imagine all of you are gearing up for the long weekend poised with your miniature union jack in hand. No? You mean you will not be one of the thousands squashed next to the Thames to see an old woman wave from a boat? I am most shocked at my fellow countrymen!

If the royals are not your thing for whatever reason (political, economical, social or you just find them a bit dull), then how about popping up to the Stoke Newington Literary Festival this weekend. The festival starts this Friday and winds down on Sunday evening with free events and ticketed ones from £3-£15.

Stokey's little festival has quite a small programme, but here quality definitely triumphs over quantity. It is also a nice alternative if, like me, you cannot find the time, money or transport to get to Hay Festival, which also happens to start this weekend.

There are a few free events such as, "Well Versed: Well Red Literature from the Morning Star", which has a variety of speakers poets and music; "A Hackney Anthology", which is readings from an anthology of local writers;"RIP The Book?", which will look at the rise of the e-books; and "Stoke Newington Poets"-I trust your intelligence to work that one out.

There is also a free writing workshop on the Saturday called "Storytails". This starts on the Saturday with professional writers sharing tips and doling out advice. On the Sunday, the group will reconvene to share what they have produced. If you have a story just waiting to leap out of you, but you don't quite know how to begin, go along.

*NOTE: I went to a very inspirational (paid for) event at the British Library last Friday with journalists Caitlin Moran, Grace Dent, Lauren Laverne, Miranda Sawyer, Laura Barton and chaired by Stewart Maconie about women in the media. I am telling everyone (well mainly women) that they can write and want to do a lot more air-punching than I did before. Just take it as positive encouragement.*

Back in Stoke Newington, by far the best-looking free event is one called "Pongy Prose for Whiffy Writers", where you can create your own smelly book. I don't really understand how, but I am intrigued. It does say it is an event for ages 6+, suggesting that adults are not encouraged to go along by themselves. However, if there is a small child you can borrow for a few hours take them as a child beard (like a gay beard but with children.)and play with smells and books to your heart's delight.

The paid for events vary from talks with popular writers such as Danny Wallace and Jenny Colgan to an amazing looking with John Cooper Clarke and Simon Day to "A Genteel Tipple Through Gin in Literature". The latter event tracks how Gin has been portrayed in Literature with gin cocktails available and it's only £4.

So indulge in the richer side of British culture that has nothing to do with crowns or corgies, but with homegrown writing talent.

I will be spending the weekend in a remote caravan in South-West Scotland with my family and a sausage dog. Not quite the same is it?

Classical Music and Dance Doused in Petrol

Britain seems to be getting very excited about outdoor screenings of, well, anything. There are to be screens in Hyde Park and Victoria Park (that's the one in the East End) for the Olympics and there are numerous outdoor film screenings throughout the summer at Somerset House, on top of The Queen of Hoxton, on/in people's sheds etc.

The Royal Opera House has jumped on the bandwagon with free outdoor screenings of operas and ballets. Doesn't that sound all sophisticated and wonderful? Oh yes I should mention that these screenings are sponsored by BP. The poster that makes it look like it's advertising a happy hardcore festival due to the nauseating green and yellow of the brand's colours.

Otherwise you should definitely go.

In London the screens will be placed in Trafalgar Square and Canary Wharf. These are two of the strangest places to make people sit for a few hours. But, I suppose sitting in Trafalgar Square with the National Gallery behind you, Nelson looking down on you and with those big Lions that tourists are always determined to climb on, well it might be nice. Canary Wharf has no soul so don't bother trying to see culture there.

There are also screens to be placed OUTSIDE LONDON. Crazy I know but apparently there is a world outside the M25. There is a long list on the website so I won't bore you with all the cities, but as well as the expected Manchester, Bristol, Edinburgh, Cardiff there are a few unexpected choices such as Coventry, Bradford and Dover. Random yes, but hey everyone deserves to see some professional tight wearers at least once in their life.

I am a little miffed because La Boheme was screened last Thursday and I managed to miss it. I wanted to see that one. Humph.

Next Wednesday 30 May at 7.30pm there will be a showing of Falstaff, an operatic commedia lirica in three acts by Giuseppe Verdi, adapted by Arrigo Boito from Shakespeare's plays The Merry Wives of Windsor and scenes from Henry IV. And yes I knew all of that just off the top of my head and was in no way copied from Wikipedia. If you have never seen opera before or know very little about it this could be the perfect opportunity to try out the form. It will be a far cheaper and more relaxed way of experiencing it and if you are bored to tears, or your bum hurts (you have to sit on the floor), then you can just leave.

The other screening, Metamorphosis: Titian 2012 Monday 16 July, 2012 at 7.30pm, is a specially comissioned ballet piece as part of the London 2012 stuff. The choreographers have been commisioned to respond to the Titian works that are now on display in London. The paintings all depict scenes from the Roman Poet Ovid's poem, Metamorphoses. So the title does make sense. Everyone likes pictures so here the Titian paintings Diana and Actaeon, The Death of Actaeon and Diana and Callisto, respectively-

So go and experience some high culture near you and if not then, in London at least, you can climb on a Lion plinth and pretend you're in Narnia.

Evening lectures for the academic within

Increasingly, I find myself finding and sourcing information from Twitter. Yes children, I loves it. So many hours to waste, too little time to waste them.

Last week I spotted a journalist (who I now can’t remember) who had tweeted about a friend of hers speaking at Birbeck University. I followed the link and found out that starting tomorrow it is Birkbeck's Arts Week, which will showcase evenings of films screenings and lectures. And it's all free! Although held and Birkbeck, and presumably for the students, anyone can go. Although it’s free you do encourage you to book.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the institution, it is university near Euston station and it's good. That's all you need to know really.

After having a quick perusal of what's on offer and there seems to be all matter of visual art, theatre and literature covered in one short week. I personally like the look of the seminar called, "Jokes, Laughter and Literature", because we wouldn't want it to be too serious would we? This is a short talk and discussion by a few of the University's academics on humour in writers through the ages.

The other thing that I thought would be pretty cool is a night called, "Loose Muse: Readings by Contemporary Women Poets". This I think would be cool for a few reason; firstly because I don't think there are enough poetry readings; and secondly there are certainly not enough women doing them. I am going to ignore the current Poet Laureate. The main reason I liked the look of this was because I thought, when I moved to London, that I would be going to poetry readings and sitting around in arty, smoke filled cafes discussing the meaning of life with young beautiful people. This has failed to happen once in the year and half I have lived here. This is mainly because I live in Brixton in 2012 and not a poorly made 80/90s teen film. A sad fact I have had to face. There is also the fact that you are no longer allowed to smoke in bars and cafes. Bastards.

Anyway, I digress. Go and have a look at the website, book, and enjoy some free culture. You might even learn something.

My attempt to be a cool arty kid.

I seem to be one of the few people who do not know about the phenomenon of "First Thursdays". I lived down the road for a year and knew nothing about it.

If you knew about it, why didn't you tell me? Hmm? And for those who still have no idea what I am referring to, but are still reading with interest, allow me to explain.

First Thhursdays are, shockingly, the first Thursday of every month. Still with me? All over East London, galleries open later for general exhibitions and special events. Tis a fairly simple idea but one that seems to amazingly popular.

Galleries like the Whitechapel and the Barbican participate in this night of artistic frivolity, but I think the best thing about it are the new artists displaying their work on this one evening a month.

I went for the first time last week up to the Vyner Street Gallery (off Cambridge Heath road before you get to the canal)to see my friend's exhibition, Breathe and Reboot, which was wonderful. There were several spaces open down this one, fairly small, road that were easily identifiable by the crowds spilling over onto the pavement by 8.30pm.

It felt all continental and nice. Or that could have just been the free/exceptionally cheap wine. Either way it was a lovely way to spend an evening and get to see something different for free.

My best bit of advice would be to set off with a group and see what you can find. By all means head to a few of the main roads, but find new places you didn't know existed. My friend and I passed Donlon Bookshop that I had never seen before but went in and found some beautiful arty books and prints. It's these little finds that I think make it worthwhile.

The website here has a pretty comprehensive list of the main galleries involved. It also shows you some walking tours if you don't fancy trying to stumble upon things. They also offer bus tours but that just seemd silly to me.

I shall see you there next month. I will be the one in oversized glasses, checked shirt looking all cool and aloof. It'll be like a real-life version of Where's Wally.

UPDATe: The Guardian have put together this slideshow of one of the shows on Vyner Street called Arthaus. A good example of some of the new work you can see. And a way to stay ahead of the Guardian.